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Well here I go...

It is 11:15PM as we speak (or type, or whatever) and I would like to give myself a pat on the back for today's achievements. Despite it being a Sunday, I was able to get my lazy bum off bed to study... the only downside is that I fumbled trying to turn off one of my many alarms and dropped my phone in the process! (It's alive and well though).

When I went to discovery to study, I saw the usual lot with their heads down. They never fail to amaze me with their ability to keep focused and motivated...it's like they LIKE studying...?! Due to their inability to converse or procrastinate during their study time, I had to conform to avoid the awkward silence. It was pretty productive in the sense that I was able to complete two CSSA past papers (Chemistry and Maths) in attempt to some what "be like them". If only I could keep up this pattern until the HSC....And on that note...I am seriously worried for my future. I stumbled and fell so low during the Trials, it almost seems impossible to make up for my spill in the externals. When other students ask for my results and I tell them "Yeah I failed", their interpretation of 'fail' seems to be -a pass but not an exceptional result-, because they always chuckle to themselves and tell me "I'm sure you did fine". It's like 'no dear 99.95 recipient, I am not you and I fail at studying'. Hmph.

It also doesn't help that some of my friends are being weird and angry...I understand that everyone in Year 12 is going through some kind of emotional breakdown with only 49 days left until Paper 1, but that isn't the queue for you to start messing with other people's stable minds. It's time like these where I wish I had a "delete" button to remove certain people from my life.... (wow that sounds so cruel) so I guess it's safe to say that I'm fed up with fake-friendships. Don't get me wrong though, I have a group of amazing best friends at school, the ones that came and never left. As soon as our eyes meet from across the corridors, we beam and run towards each other for hugs and we're able to find humour in the littlest of things. Lunch times can never be more rewarding and funny. It's so sad to think that all of this would be gone within the matter of weeks, the laughter, the cuddles, the inside jokes... I'm tearing up thinking about it WOW!!!! (CONTROL YOUR HORMONES DAHEE). 

Anyway...

I just realised how pointless this blog is...its full of rambles, complaints and irrelevant information, so if you're reading this....good on you! You'll be excited to know that the purpose of this blog is for that very reason, for me to complain, ramble and rage about things..

P.S: I previously owned blogs of all sorts, but none like this where it involves such intimacy...I feel so weird writing it.

P.P.S: I probably could have written a full essay with the time taken to process this blog (oops) don't tell my mother. 

Bye! P:-) <--- that is a smiley wearing a snapback #swag